Tuesday, July 24, 2012

No Bones About It

It seems, once again, our little Miley is miffed. Ever since we read and enjoyed "The Art of Racing in the Rain" the novel as told from the POV of Enzo the dog, my sweet pup has been awaiting her turn at bat. And now she's learned that the Blog "Text From Dog" has landed a book deal. See here:
She is not amused. I explained to her that it isn't easy to get published. I told her all about how the average writer must possess equal parts talent, luck, patience and incredibly good timing.
Yet, she is still perturbed. Perhaps something in my explanation was lost in the translation.
If I'm being honest, Miley may be cute but she isn't terribly creative. It's not for the lack of trying. I've sat with her for hours on end, just waiting for something amusing to spring from her tiny black lips.
Aside from the occasional yawn and bark...nothing. I've read her all the amusing anecdotes I could find in hopes of igniting her muse. The most I got out of her in return was a rousing game of fetch. Not all that novel-worthy, I'm afraid.
It would appear that Miley is destined to live the average canine life.She pretends to be put-off by this, complaining - "What good is an author-less existence?" But deep down something tells me she's just as content hanging out on the sofa, a new bone resting between her paws, helplessly resigned to leaving the writing thing to her Mama.
                                                             Miley - The Couch Potato Puppy

Saturday, July 14, 2012

What Goes Up

It's high time I face it. They say the first step to solving a problem is admitting you have one, right? Well, Blogger is all about tackling the tough stuff today. And I'm not afraid to admit I'm afraid. Of what, you ask? (Queue the theme song from Jaws.) No, not Great Whites, although they rattle my nerves, too.
No, we're talking a more ferocious beast, one who often hides behind a facade of piped-in music and buttons all adorned in pretty bright lights. That's right.
The Elevator.
Terrifying, I know. It's like one of those bad horror flicks. I'll set the scene: Oblivious Woman Character has to get to the 14th floor. She wears a placid grin and aims for The Elevator. She presses the button and strums her fingers on her purse strap as she waits. Along IT comes, inviting her in so innocently, sliding its doors open in a wide-mouthed hello. Oblivious Woman ambles inside, (this is the part when somebody is yelling at the screen, "Don't go in there, lady!") But she doesn't hear. Once inside The Elevator doors roll closed. It's eaten her alive only she doesn't know it because she's being lulled by an instrumental version of Muskrat Love coming at her from the invisible speakers.
 She begins her ascent, checking her wristwatch to be sure she's on time for her appointment with her holistic healer. Little does she know there won't be any good karma in store for her today. All at once the gears begin to grind loudly. Oblivious Woman looks around. The Elevator slows up and then lurches to a screeching halt. OW releases a dainty expletive. After a few minutes without any sign of movement she reaches for the phone attached to the wall. Fool! Of course it doesn't work! She checks her cell. Naturally there's no reception. What did she expect? OW's heart starts racing. She calls out for help.
But nobody can hear her. She is trapped between the 12th and 13th floor. So close and yet hideously so far. Is there enough air in here, she wonders, as a cold sweat breaks out at her brow. The Elevator smirks. It has taken another victim. With any luck she'll panic and pass out before she's rescued. Perhaps she'll even perish for lack of adequate oxygen. The Elevator emits a treacherous laugh - (think Vincent Price in Thriller), claiming another innocent life.

And there you have it. The very valid, totally realistic reason this girl will opt for the stairs whenever possible.
Stay tuned for The Elevator - Part Two - where the cables fail and an unsuspecting rider plummets twenty stories to his tragic demise. 

Thursday, July 5, 2012

Summer Reads Giveaway Hop

Things are really heating up on the Hook this week! Our latest giveaway has arrived and I'm super excited to make some new friends and welcome back those of you who have been here before. Thanks again to Kathy for this awesome hop. http://iamareadernotawriter.blogspot.com/2012/05/summer-reads-giveaway-hop-sign-ups.html.

You guys remember being a kid and the glorious days of summer break? They seemed to last forever, didn't they? My memories are oh-so-sweet. Long days spent at the town pool, chlorine-scented skin, the Ice Cream Man, flashlight tag, scraped knees, sand-lined beach bags and lightning bugs in a jar to name a few...it just doesn't get much better than that, does it? 'Tis my favorite season of all. To help celebrate the calendars hottest months we are giving away a signed copy of WISHLESS, my debut novel. Just follow the Rafflecopter below (read more) to be entered to win. Don't forget to take a moment while you're here to share your fondest summer memory...

Keep cool!