It has been nearly impossible to avoid. All the news stories, the headlines, the op-eds and the rants. Our nation is in turmoil. Folks are screaming about racism and rights, justice and brutality. In all, the unsettling nature of these past few months is cringe-worthy.
I'm not here to choose a side. Nor do I wish to shake my head in contempt.
I just want to go back.
Now more than ever, I want to be a child again. Maybe five or ten years old. When I didn't know the way things worked when things didn't work in this world. When I believed everyone was equally kind and intelligent. When I was ignorant to the ignorance. Back when I couldn't have imagined the subjective divide. Or the depth of the differences.
I just want to go back.
Some might say this shows a lack of empathy. Some may think my wish is a head-in-the-sand answer that won't solve anything. Yet I look around me at all the anger raging out of control. What good will come of it? I see fear disguised as false bravado. Accusations made without fact or merit. Furious voices pinned on high. What use is another? In this battle of who can shout the loudest - I'm whispering:
I just want to go back.
It would be dishonest of me to claim to be neutral. My feelings are very much engaged. I see a sad set of circumstances being contorted to fill a simmering pot of prejudice stew. In my mind, none of the events of the past few months is about any one particular hatred. Though I can understand that thinking. I can open my thoughts enough to see that clouded emotions and overwrought tensions are calling the shots. But my heart insists that violence isn't an earned response. It's a prelude to an even greater divide. Wishing alone won't bring change. Asking people to choose their own words and actions with care won't mean that they will. Phrases like "respect for all" and "peace on earth" mean nothing if they aren't enacted. It's terribly frustrating. Scary, even.
I just want to go back.
But I can't. I'm fully grown. An adult. A mother. A shaper of two young minds that I brought into this mixed-up world. And those young minds are grown up now, too. I've heard many parents crying out in concern for the safety of their children. Yes, we are all worried. This anxiety isn't exclusive to any one race or religion. It's a human fear. Remember- if you will - if only for a moment - that the enforcers of the law have parents, too. In our quest for equality, please let us not stop short of any man or woman - even those who have chosen to protect and serve. Let us see each person without their labels. Just long enough to take a breath.
Because going back is not an option. We can only ever go forward. Not in disgust. Not with disdain or discord. So for now, in the spirit of all that is hopeful, and perhaps, sadly, just as unattainable - I'll make a new wish..
I just want peace.
I'm not here to choose a side. Nor do I wish to shake my head in contempt.
I just want to go back.
Now more than ever, I want to be a child again. Maybe five or ten years old. When I didn't know the way things worked when things didn't work in this world. When I believed everyone was equally kind and intelligent. When I was ignorant to the ignorance. Back when I couldn't have imagined the subjective divide. Or the depth of the differences.
I just want to go back.
Some might say this shows a lack of empathy. Some may think my wish is a head-in-the-sand answer that won't solve anything. Yet I look around me at all the anger raging out of control. What good will come of it? I see fear disguised as false bravado. Accusations made without fact or merit. Furious voices pinned on high. What use is another? In this battle of who can shout the loudest - I'm whispering:
I just want to go back.
It would be dishonest of me to claim to be neutral. My feelings are very much engaged. I see a sad set of circumstances being contorted to fill a simmering pot of prejudice stew. In my mind, none of the events of the past few months is about any one particular hatred. Though I can understand that thinking. I can open my thoughts enough to see that clouded emotions and overwrought tensions are calling the shots. But my heart insists that violence isn't an earned response. It's a prelude to an even greater divide. Wishing alone won't bring change. Asking people to choose their own words and actions with care won't mean that they will. Phrases like "respect for all" and "peace on earth" mean nothing if they aren't enacted. It's terribly frustrating. Scary, even.
I just want to go back.
But I can't. I'm fully grown. An adult. A mother. A shaper of two young minds that I brought into this mixed-up world. And those young minds are grown up now, too. I've heard many parents crying out in concern for the safety of their children. Yes, we are all worried. This anxiety isn't exclusive to any one race or religion. It's a human fear. Remember- if you will - if only for a moment - that the enforcers of the law have parents, too. In our quest for equality, please let us not stop short of any man or woman - even those who have chosen to protect and serve. Let us see each person without their labels. Just long enough to take a breath.
Because going back is not an option. We can only ever go forward. Not in disgust. Not with disdain or discord. So for now, in the spirit of all that is hopeful, and perhaps, sadly, just as unattainable - I'll make a new wish..
I just want peace.
Very informative, keep posting such good articles, it really helps to know about things.
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